The answer to the common question

“So, how is married life?” That is the common question right now.

Now, I have asked this question in the past, when I was still single. I honestly wanted to know what it was like to be married, especially in the first few weeks of a marriage, and how it differs from being single or dating, and to get an idea how the answer changes over time.

I have also observed several married people (either married for a short amount of time, or for many many years) ask the question. I interpret the question differently than the single person’s question. “Remind me of what it was like to be freshly married, help me see how much I have learned, how much things have changed or stayed the same, how does your married differ from my own, or is it similar to mine.”

Short answer-

Doug and I have gone on a honeymoon/vacation, and have gone back to work.

Long answer-

No one ever mentioned that there is a huge amount of analytical planning logistics involved in all of that. It might seem obvious, after thinking about it, but the romantic side of me, when dreaming about the first few days and nights of a honeymoon, didn’t think of the logistics of moving bags from one place to another, having to be on time, traveling through airports, transportation in other cities/countries, etc. I only thought of the relaxation and the fun and the dreamy Hollywood romance kind of stuff. But, we told ourselves, we also planned a wedding. Next time we go on vacation, we will know better, and will have the vacation planned better.

We learned a little about communicating and working as a team to get something done, and to help the other person in areas they are not the best at. For example, I have trouble lifting heavy bags- Doug helped me with that.

We had a wonderful time traveling throughout Australia, and we will have to share pictures and the stories of adventure, once we get that all organized.

And to answer the “Is your marriage like mine?” Well, if you know either of us very well, you know there is an on-going whip cream battle that recently extended into chocolate pudding too. So, if you end up in the kitchen laughing so hard you can barely breathe, chocolate pudding on glasses, in hair, on faces, on shirts, on floor, on counters with a cat licking up the spots she can reach, then yes, ours is like yours. We are still trying to figure out the morning routine better, but I do like having breakfast with him. And, he scraped the ice and snow off my car this morning too. We have the normal bills to pay, and he picked up groceries the other day. After the chocolate pudding laughter fit, we watched “Finding Nemo” to see the coral on the reef again. We are taking time this week to relax and get our feet under us, before we start visiting people again.

So my question in return is this- “Is this is what married life is like, with its ups and downs, learning curves, helping each other out, discovery, laughter and adventure?”

Or maybe I am over analyzing, as usual, and it was either a simple question, or there was an underlying question, not mentioned above. So, the answer to both of those is… “Great!”